Nice at 67 better never but so what old ugly git

The best and worst of Police practices – a man’s viewpoint Imagine this scenario because it is a real one and it happens. Believe an experienced old fart, me Your wife/female partner throws a wobbly and calls the police
They come to your house
Often male and female police officer, but it does not matter
They WILL arrest YOU and take YOU away
Your name can be Harry Prince of all Christendom and beyond
Tough babe, YOU are going to the station
Yes
YOU will be eventually (takes 6 hours min) be fingerprinted, swabbed, dna’d and chuckled at YOU are all about and a PART of procedure mate andf of WE do it all THIS way the BLUE way
Take with you from home your entire collection of teabags milk and proper cup, 6 novels, I reference book, CD’s, cleaning cloths, spare shooe laces and some sandwiches, enough for the boys in blue too
FORGET the very existsance of words such as ‘rights ‘human ‘procedure’ ‘normal’ ‘when’ ‘expeditious’ and many others you will be unable even to pronounce THESE, NONE – are in the Sam Johnson V revised Engerlish dixshunHarrie
Chew up on the way and ingest ALL bits of paper
take out a subscription to the Guardian, try to get an online copy if you can, it goes further and is difficult to loose
Yes iften means hardly ever if at all means quite a abtuse thing
It’s like this can I tell you my version
The correc reply if who fuckin cares Ivan the Magnificatt IIvvvxxii just sharrap stooopid
You can have what you want just press the bell we will bring it straight away
Means don’t friggin push it, YOU will get what we say WHEN we say it right, nowt else git head
My 9 year old daughter I have to get her from school please I have been here more than 5 hours now for nothing and I live in Peterbrough and if u had called me on the phone and if you do ever I will come why should I not
risposte : disinterested silence and a polite shake of a diagonal head
Tomorrow we will deal with slammer speakInglish version V in Swahili
Hey mates lovers queers and all plebs and gits m- call uis for a friendly chat ANYTIME ON.............psd.complaints@cambs.pnn.police.uk
sURE WITHOUT FAIL mR pLOD JUST AS SOON AS WE CAN IN 2099 BABY FII
The Chief Constable here is Mr Simon Parr and do NOT quote my name whenh you send me greetings cards right, just desist ok!!!!